Dear Individuals from whom I receive email to my work address,
Please, please, please re-read your long-winded email before pressing send. Why on earth would I want to read your email when clearly you didn’t take the time to edit it before passing it on to me? Having to fill in the words that you absentmindedly forgot to type isn’t like mad libs. It’s annoying. I mean, who to read random and just guess what person is saying?
Also, I understand the ocassional miss-usage of “there, their and they’re” –but this really shouldn’t be a patterned behavior. Google it.
And there is never a need to add two additional periods to your ellipses. “So on that note…..” Yep. I’m pretty confident that THREE periods communicated your unfinished thought just as well as the FIVE you chose to type.
And two exclamation points seems ridiculous. One exclamation mark is sufficient. Two is stupid. Three is over-kill. Stop it. If you type five I’ll be forced to automatically click “reply” and type, “OMG……… REALLY?????????!!!!!!!!!” (Note: Birthday greetings can include up to three exclamation points, per my husband’s declaration.)
This is work. This is business.
Leave your puncutation baggage at home.
And another thing, I’m not so confident that texting abbreviations are kosher within work email, either.
For example, when I email inquiring about a price of a particular item or request follow-up information regarding your service, don’t type me back and include the shortened version of “you”.
Acceptable: “You should receive the order within 8 business days.”
Not acceptable: “U should receive the order w/in 8 business days.”
What? Adding the “y” and the “o” takes too much effort? Well if so, I can see that typing “within” was a torrent struggle so naturally, “w/in” makes more sense.
That’s all for now,
Disclaimer: I know I’ve made PLENTY of grammatical errors on this blog. In fact, it sears my core when I see one. Or, better yet, when C. points one out to me. I blame the fact that I’m pregnant. And sometimes I read and re-read my posts SO many times before I click “publish” that I’m physically unable to see my errors. So bear in mind that this post is merely my attempt at satire. Sort of.