I wasn’t blown away by the fashion at the Emmy’s tonight. It was just kind of “eh” for me. But I’ll tell you what, I’m blown away by how great Tina Fey looked.
Let’s get moving.
First, let’s talk about the no-colors.
We’ve got Christina Hendricks here wearing Christian Soriano. First, her uptop is a WONDER. The dress is fine, but I hate the belt. But I mean, who’s looking at the belt?
This is Connie Britton. I do not watch whatever show she’s on, but I can tell you that I hate this belted, long, sparkly tennis dress. And battleship grey is seldom flattering. There. I said it. And her hair? Too much. Blech.
This is Emily Van Camp wearing J. Mendel and the neckline is PAINFUL. The girl looks like she’s 22 and the dress looks like something Susan Sarandon would wear. The dress is awful. The stitching and placement of stylistic details (er… whatever) look awful. BOO.
GREY? I hate grey gowns.
This is Vada from that one movie with MacAuley Culkin and Dan Akroid. Anna Chlumsky is wearing a cute dress, but this is for someone older. This just seems oddly age-inappropriate.
Crank it up – make it hot pink. Or yellow. Or better yet, orange!
UGH. I absolutely loathe this Versace dress on Lucy Liu. (She’s gorgeous.) This was not the MTV awards.The bodice is just over-worked and weird. It’s far too Roman Empire. Almost my worst-dressed.
And here’s Amanda Peet in Calvin Klein.
I couldn’t hate this MORE.
Um, not my favorite Vivienne Westwood (Vivienne’s namesake) of the night. Kerry Washington is gorgeous, but her hair is haphazard and this dress has been done. It’s tired and I’m tired of it.
The best thing about Phoebe Price‘s dress is her shoes.
Come on, hello too much? Too much hair. Too much dress. Too much everything.
Oh, Kristen Wiig – you are so funny but you are a chronic horrendous dresser.
It’s just all bad for the Emmy’s. It is fine for a night of salsa dancing or a beach wedding. But for the Emmy’s? I swear, she’s the new old-Tina Fey. (I love Tina, but she has only recently started looking better at awards shows.)
This is just sad.
And here’s Jessica Pare. She’s gorgeous, sure. However, I just feel that this dress has happened a thousand times over.
“Jessica! Wear this gown, it’s like a take on a greek goddess but it’s TOTALLY DIFFERENT… because there’s a thin black satin belt added to it.”
Next, the prints!
Young Ariel Winter from Modern Family looks cute. She’s a kid. She’s wearing a fun print.
I love it!
However, I’m not sold on the shoe choice. But seriously? WHAT color/style of shoes do you wear with this?
Now, before you lose it, I’m going to say that I really like Elisabeth Moss’ gown. I think it just so happens that she’s not overly photogenic and her dress isn’t either.
Still, when I was watching the Red Carpet I swear I loved this dress. It’s a super cute, feminine and fun.
Yeah, I know. I said it. I love it.
Clearly, I’m just ready for some change and FUN on the red carpet.
Now, the funny ladies.
Amy Poehler, oh Amy. Oh, Amy. I hate your Stella McCartney dress. It was way too long. It was ill-fitting and your boobs looked weird.
It just looked very old-school-stripper-1976. Boo.
Julia Louis-Dreyfus, as a general rule, annoys me. (I didn’t love Seinfeld either. [insert gasps here.]).
All that aside — holy Wow, this woman looks fantastic. Absolutely and utterly age appropriate and the draping and color of this Vera Wang gown? Incredible. Wow. Impeccable.
(Hey Amy Poheler, this is how a dress should fit.)
Jane Krakowski looks great. She’s the one exception to my glitter-dress annoyance.
She looks lovely.
And I covet her hair.
Zooey Deschanel looked fine. I think it’s a huge improvement from her awards show gowns of yore. Still, doesn’t it just need to be pulled up a titch? Seems to be a sizing issue?
For once, one DAY, I want to see her looking elegant. Not like a little Powderpuff Fairy of Quirkyland.
TINA FEY (the all-caps are necessary) LOOKS ASTOUNDING.
I gasped when I saw her. This is the FIRST TIME ever that she hasn’t looked like a dressed-up school marm. She looks outstanding and gorgeous and well-put-together in her Vivienne Westwood gown. I’m shocked. Look! She’s wearing a COLOR! No black!
I love it. LOVE it on her.
Speaking of looking incredible – did you guys see Edie Falco? Um, there is something about this navy blue and white gown that I loved.
Aw, and the cutest (and only) pregnant woman of the night award goes to Claire Danes. She looked lovely. And bravo to her for not wearing black.
I kind of always love Ginnifer Goodwin. I love the color (obviously). It’s fun and she looks ADORABLE and I love the whole look – including the shoes.
Now, the shoes I would burn are on Gretchen Mol’s feet.
I’m sorry, WHAT?
Padma is gorgeous and everything, but she’s just kind of EH. Still she rocked the orange dress, no?
I do not know who this actress is but I can safely say that I feel sorry for her that she’s wearing this gown.
I loved this.
I loved this.
Change! Color! Julianne More looks gorgeous. Great hair. Age appropriate.
FUN. I absolutely love it.
This is yellow done right.
Julie Bowen looks horrendous. Frizzy hair, over-tanned, too much eye-make up. Very Jersey shore. I couldn’t hate this more.
This is yellow done wrong.
Ok. What do you guys think?
I can’t decide if I like this or hate it. I mean, I would never wear it, but the colors are pretty on Hayden Panitierre – it seems to go with her skin tone. But that’s a ton of fabric for someone who’s like 4′ 11″.
I will not say a cross word about Giuliana because I’m just so happy that she and her husband have a son.
The dress, albeit boring, looks perfect on her.
Kelly looks INCREDIBLE. Even her grey-purple hair doesn’t kill me here. I love this look.
The cute little girl from Mad Men, Kiernan something-or-other, is growing up. What a cutie pie. She looks adorable.
She stands better than I do.
Sofia Vergara looks like a mermaid.
And I don’t think that’s a great thing.
Someone had to take over the crazy Cher-like Bob Mackie gowns.
Ashley Judd‘s hair is about 3 inches too high.
That bow behind her neck is about 3 inches too big.
And that dress is about 3 shades too pink.
This seriously makes me laugh.
And, the worst of the night.
Glenn Close. It was too easy. What in the WORLD would you inspire to wear this dress? Wah-t?
You are a gorgeous, mature woman. This is exactly the opposite of those adjectives.
Too much, Heidi. Too.much.seafoam green. The earrings are stupid. The neckline is FAR too plunging. The slits are ridiculous. The shoes are helacious. The tan is too much.
I could not HATE this whole ensemble MORE.
Speaking of seafoam – here’s Ryan Seacrest’s little lady, Julianne Hough, also looking like a seafoam mermaid. I hate the piping and most notably I hate the bodice design. It’s like a tuxedo on her breasts and I hate that.
I don’t even have words for how much I hate the bottom details.
Jenna Malone looks like she’s just flaming angry. It shows in the severity of her hair, her dress, her FACE.
Perk up – little lady. It’s HOLLYWOOD.
And your brown dress is ugly.
Mayim Bialak looks like she’s wearing the dress that Glenn Close was supposed to wear. Perhaps they should have exchanged gowns.
You are YOUNG. Why are you covering absolutely EVERYTHING? It’s September in Hollywood.
Ok, here are my bests.
Now, may the record state again that I’m not a fan of January Jones. She lacks personality and usually dresses like a tool. I think she’s an awful actress, as well.
Still, I love this Zac Posen gown.
Was it the right venue for it? I’m not so sure. But I have to tell you, I love it. It’s couture. And fun. And different. Love.
Next, I loved this Giambattista Valli Couture gown on Julianna Marguiles. EVERYTHING about this is lovely. The styling is perfect. The mid-century nod. The dress is just fun (pockets!) — it’s FANTASTIC. I love, love, LOVE it.
And finally, my favorite dress of the night.
Now, keep in mind, I like this dress because I would wear it.
I loved Leslie Mann‘s Naeem Khan’s gown.
It’s orange. The crocheted top. The turquoise accents. I’m just a fan. I love this.
So, that it, amigos.
What did you think?!