Because it’s a list kind of day…
I cannot abide:
2. Warm toilet seats.
3. Shrimp (I still hate shrimp because of the shrimp tea incident.)
4. Status updates about how you have the flu/norovirus, etc. I don’t want to know what’s going on with your GI tract.
5. Status updates about how you hate that people aren’t your real friends. Ok, then DELETE them from your facebook account. Better yet, delete me! (Oh wait, we’re related…)
6. Status updates that ask me to “like them” so that they can go to Disneyland, get a dog, etc. I have an idea, like my status and then send me $10 on paypal. Everyone. Across the land. So I can collect a lot of money.
7. Sour milk. There I was eating a big piece of chocolate cake with a cold glass of sour milk. [insert vomit]
8. Survival shows.
9. Age spots.
10. Sunshine on days when I’m crabby. Because when I’m in a windy mood I need WIND and RAIN.
11. Grocery shopping in Los Cabos. (Where can I find 100% whole grain quinoa? More importantly, WHY DON’T THEY SELL ANY LITTLE DEBBIE PRODUCTS HERE? Yes. I’m clearly NOT on the paleo diet.)
12. The lack of access to Wendy’s frostys. (Still not on the paleo diet.)
13. Huffy people. You know them. They huff in response to most things. They huff when they walk and stomp away. They’re perpetually put-upon.
15. The incessant squeaking happening in the front quarter-panel of my car. As Lila says, “I think there’s mices living up there…”
I can abide:
1. Waking up to Vivienne saying, “Good morning, Yiya” and Lila responding, “Hi.”
2. Craig laughing at most of my jokes. And pretty much everything I say.
3. My two snuggly dogs.
4. My bed. I love bed.
7. Deleting Facebook off of my phones.
8. Watching Lila plie at ballet.
9. Sunshine. When I’m in the mood for it.
10. Emails with friends from home that make me laugh. And laugh.
11. Emails with friends from home that make me cry.
12. Social media, when it’s used for good.
14.The smell of matches.
15. These two: