So I need a new wall calendar because I’m 10 and I like having an actual calendar hanging in my pantry to boast my work-out stickers.
I put a sticker on the calendar for everyday that I work out. (I already mentioned that I’m 10.)
The truth of the matter is that a quality sticker is just as much of a motivator to me as a stack of cheese or swimsuit season. (Please note that swimsuit season is pretty much year-round here. Blech. Hurl. Lol. I said “hurl.” See? Still 10.)
Anywho, I went to Office Max today to buy a calendar and there were about 5 choices:
1. Mexican kitchens – pass.
2. Justin Bieber – this would have been a possibility last year. But now he’s such a little jerk. pass.
3. Monster High – um, no. I don’t like scary things.
4. Beaches – really? Um, probably not.
4. Puppies – well, maybe..
The puppies calendar was $289.00 pesos. That’s $22.00 for a calendar purchased after the New Year.
So, to amazon I go.
A simple search of “2014 wall calendar” reveals these beauties.
The “All My Friends are Dead 2014 Wall Calendar” for $12.59. (Link here.)
Humorous, but perhaps a little more morose than what I need in 2014?
I like the cassette tape one.
Then another option is this.
“Underwater dogs” for $10.10. (Link here.)
I like dogs. But this calendar makes me anxious.
What if the dogs don’t want to be in an “Underwater dogs” calendar?
What if they hate goggles?
What if we think they’re swimming but they’re really just paddling for their lives?
Nope. This one’s not for me.
And then there’s this.
“I could Pee on This and Other Poems by Cats.” $9.59. (Link here.)
Another strong mark against cats.
Crass. Rude. Self-serving.
THEY WALK ON YOUR COUNTERS, YOU GUYS.
Not getting this calendar based solely on principle.
AND… the annual Ansel Adams calendar. $13.33. (Link here.)
I had this calendar in high school. Twice. I thought I was so cool. “Look, I understand and relate to black and white landscapes.”
I’m kind of over it.
I like nature fine, but… grey nature… eh.
At first glance, this Mary Engelbreit is far more positivity than I can handle…
But it is awfully cute. $14.39. (Link here.)
And I think the girls would like it…
This is a definite maybe.
“Why Grizzly Bears Should Wear Underpants.” $9.49. (Link here.)
This has been rated a 5-star calendar. (By 3 people.)
I don’t want to have to read “bear balls” out loud to my ladies… so, this might be a pass. (See below.)
Um, this may be the winner. Great fonts. Happy drawings. BOOM.
Masha D’yans. $13.49. (Link here.)
I think this is IT.
And then there’s this, “Nuns Having Fun 2014 Wall Calendar.” (Link here.)
It warms my heart to see this.
I can’t explain it.
How cute are they?
“Sisters that pray together, sleigh together?”
And this speaks for itself. “Extraordinary Chickens.” $12.59. (Link here.)
It’s sort of “beaked” my interest. hahahahaha. Get it?
I wish there were more photos of the various months. I may have to buy this.
I mean, how cute is that chicken?
**Buying this will pretty much guarantee that I will go back to being a meatless eater. (We were meatless eaters for 8 years, did you know that? We still ate fish and eggs.)
This is fantastic, too. “Awkward Family Photos 2014 Calendar.” $9.99. (Link here.)
How do I not buy this? Just look at that Dad’s snarl.
From what I can tell, this is wholly worth the $9.99.
Seriously, I want to buy this but it just seems inappropriate that the girls would see me laughing at seemingly innocent (but let’s be honest, there are some potential serial killers in there) people each time I open the pantry and see this calendar hanging there.
I need some more time to stew.
**Nope, I’m not compensated for this post. I just like calendars.