I love the Oscars. I honestly think it’s the absolute best fashion event of the year. It’s my Super Bowl.
The fashion. The stars. Jared Leto…
And, how cool that each year the winners get to take home a mini Kristin Chenoweth, er, I mean an Oscar.
Let’s jump in.
Kristin looks stunning in this golden statue-esque Robert Cavalli number.
I think she looks like a doll with short hair and the cut and fit of this dress was perfect on her. At first I wasn’t a big fan of the u-shaped molded neckline, but it just works. This gown is like the BEST Vanna White could ever dream to look.
I think one of the things I love about the Oscars is that everyone just looks grown up and sophisticated and lovely. I think that Sara Ishaq looked gorgeous. I love the gilded look. I think she looks just pretty.
It appeared that non-colors were quite popular this year on the red carpet: golds and beiges and varying shades of white.
Here is Sally Hawkins from Blue Jasmine wearing a very Duggar-approved modest get-up with exceptionally long sleeves.
Next up we have Julie Delpy in this Jenny Packham gown.
I’ll be honest, when I first saw this I thought… “Gross.”
But there is something about this sheer gown that I really like… for someone Helen Mirren’s age.
Julie is only 43. I just feel that this is too old for her, no?
Giuliana Rancic looks silly.
This gown by Paolo Sebastian is just too frou-frou.
I hate it. So much.
The top is just too dainty. I mean shorten this to tea-length and BOOM! You’ve got Swan Lake.
I’ll be honest, I would have much rather seen her husband, but in lieu of him… we’ve got Jessica Biel wearing too many accessories. I think the whole look is just tired.
The gown is by Chanel Couture and it’s ok for me.
I’m not, nor have I ever been, a huge fan of Angelina Jolie. (She’s going to be an incredible Maleficent.) But, I’m thrilled not to be seeing her thigh (do you remember that?) and that she looks human and less angry.
Next we have Ashley Wagner and I literally cannot get over the shwoop in her hair.
I love it.
“OK, so take all of your hair that’s on the left, THROW IT ON TO THE TOP OF YOUR HEAD and then we’ll spray it and then hurry up and get in the car and go. Just don’t tilt your head to the left because it will all fall.”
The dress is b-o-r-i-n-g. The hair is not.
So next is Jennifer Garner wearing Oscar de la Renta.
Here’s why I like this dress. Because it’s something different than what she normally wears.
She usually does curve-hugging gowns in navy and jewel tones. This time, she let her sparkle out.
BOOM. It’s art deco perfection. LET YOUR SPARKLE SHINE.
When Lila saw this dress she just said, “Oh. Well. maybe. Um. Well.”
First off, this gown is too big, Cristin Millioti. (Don’t worry. There are worse things. Just pull.it.up.)
Secondly, that color of lipstick is silly. What? You’re 15 and mad at your Mom?
Trust us. You will one day grow up and wish you didn’t wear bruise-colored lipstick to the Academy Awards.
This is just an unfortunate situation.
So Calista Flockhart looks lovely in Andrew Gn. (How do you say, “Gn”?) Anywho.
I love this. The sleeves. The silhouette. It’s perfect and demure and classic.
I’ll say it again, MAN.
There is such a thing as too.much.botox.
Goldie and Kurt. They’re cute, though.
So some people did wear color. Bette Midler wore this gorgeous Reem Acra number and I love it! (That’s the first exclamation point I’ve used, I believe…) I just love this gown. It’s happy.
Next we have Alec Baldwin’s daughter, Ireland Baldwin. I think this is age-appropriate and cute. Why was she there? No clue. But I’m a sucker for ruffled sleeves.
This concerns me.
The husband-o-mine saw her in real-life a few weeks ago and he said she is “very, very small” –so maybe the thinness is ok? But I’m sort of worried for her. I think she wears the same-sized underpants as my 4.5-year-old.
I didn’t even look at the dress.
So here’s Olga Kurylenko in Suzi Amis.
It’s a completely “green” dress. I don’t hate the top. I just don’t like where the top meets the bottom.
She looked better in red back in 2011 here… (see from the ‘ole blog below.)
And then there are the movie stars.
Here’s Charlize Theron wearing a stunning Christian Dior gown.
For some reason I feel like Charlize is daring me to find something wrong with her dress, (look at her face), but I can’t do it.
This is just kind of flawless.
So, you win, Charlize.
So here’s Emma Watson wearing Vera Wang. (Is anyone else surprised that this is Vera Wang?)
It sort of feels like Sharon Stone should be wearing this to a brunch.
And it also sort of feels like it’s part of the traveler’s collection at Chicco’s.
Glenn Close is gorgeous.
I don’t hate this. I think she looks age appropriate and lovely. I would like to see something that sparkles, though. But… still… lovely.
And along the same lines as Glenn Close is Julia Roberts. She looks gorgeous. Would I have chosen this peplum? Probably not. But there is no mistaking that Julia is stunning.
(And I like her blonde. And I don’t like her shoes.)
And… then there’s Meryl Streep in Lanvin.
She looks lovely. Normally, this 18-time-Oscar nominee dresses… strange.
This times she’s pulled it together and more importantly, still.looks.like.her.
I love it.
I’m sorry but I haven’t had an opportunity to look at Portia de Rossi’s dress yet because I cannot get over her a.) horrendous highlights from 1998 and her b.) frozen face.
If I could get past that, I’d say that she looks fine in this Naeem Khan gown.
Viola Davis looks stunning in this Escada gown. I love the cut, fit and color.
And her arms/shoulders look fantastic.
Sandra Bullock looks perfect.
I’m not blown away, but I also have nothing negative to say. This Alexander McQueen gown is gorgeous. The perfect Oscar gown.
She’s so pretty. And look, she’s aging yet STILL looks like herself/a human.
So next we have Kristen Bell, the voice of Anna from Frozen. (She’s a big deal in our house, right now. Well, Anna is.)
Anywho, normally I wouldn’t like this Cavalli gown, but Lila thought it was stunning and Kristen did say that she was going for a “Frozen-theme.” So, ok. I get it.
But this is your one free pass.
You know how I feel about chokers. (Even if they ‘re made of diamonds.) (The bottom of the gown is just so bad.)
So here’s Elsa, from Frozen. Idina Menzel has been incredible in my world since I discovered RENT in college. Oh, I love her. (How about John Travolta screwing up her name and calling her “Adele Nazim.” WHAT? THAT, my friends, is what scientology does to you.)
I think she looks lovely in this green Vera Wang gown. It’s perfectly draped.
Now for the WORST dressed. This is easy.
Penelope Cruz is… um… a mess.
This Giambattista Valli Couture gown is guilty of multitasking. The shoulder drape, the un-even under-boob black bow, the draping below the waist, the random hunk of material hanging over the right arm.
Wearing this dress is a responsibility.
Pharrell, you know that I love you, so why do you need to dress like a dork?
I mean, he looks like a dork.
And his lady friend? I had that haircut in second grade. Sexy.
Boo to both.
I’m always ready for a good print.
This high-to-low Monique Lhullier gown on Chrissy Teigen bothers me. It’s springy. It’s dumb. Just no.
And my runner-up WORST DRESS goes to the never-disappointing, Anne Hathaway.
That girl just can’t bring herself to stay away from hideous gowns. THAT NECKLINE.
What? Is she wearing epcot?
Yes. She is.
And it’s bad.
And the worst-dressed of the night goes to Anna Kendrick.
WHAT IS HAPPENING HERE?
I am not going to miss that dress when it’s gone.
I’ll tell you what, TOO MUCH is happening.
All of those lines, the fabric crossing over, the bare midriff, the leg slit, the frayed fabric, the platforms.
This is just sad.
Why didn’t someone tell her? This J Mendel gown is a hot, hot mess.
Finally, the best dressed.
I adore Kelly Osbourne in this Badgley Mischka. It’s perfect.
I adore the bolero. It’s perfection. I adore the silhouette of the gown. Her hair (sans the color, which still annoys me), is perfect.
Kelly Osbourne looks stunning.
I haven’t seen Kate Hudson in quite some time, but she looks perfect in this Atelier Versace gown. I mean, come on.
That body. That color.
I just love the old Hollywood glamour of this.
And then there’s Amy Adams in Gucci Premiere. Holly wow.
You know, I’m not a big fan of navy or blue, as a general rule… but this?
The lines are perfect.
She’s not pretending. She’s who she is and she is stunning.
This is fabulous.
And you guys, I’m sorry.
I know it’s too obvious.
BUT YOU GUYS.
Lupita Nyong’o in Prada is… well… perfection.
And that’s exactly why I can’t choose her as Best Dressed.
I love the shade of blue against her skin.
I liked it all.
She is by far the most fantastic of the evening. Oh, Cate Blanchett. I kind of love you.
This gown is perfect for her.
It matches her SKIN, ya’ll. Her skin.
She looks better than the model. (Glad she nixed the belt.)
So that’s that.
What did you think?