Dear 2015, Last year I vowed to give you a whirl, even though I wasn’t excited about it. I vowed to just keep moving forward because secretly I knew I had no choice. (I like attainable goals.) Last year, I…
Archives for December 2014
They’re so right.
Have you watched this Spanish Ikea commercial? (Don’t worry, there are subtitles.) Sigh. Link here if you can’t see it. [I watched this this morning and promptly played dolls with Vivienne as soon as she asked…] —
on grief: all was calm, all is bright
So about Christmas. Last year, Christmas was wretched. It was so, so hard for me. My Mom died and I was living in a fog. :: I just re-read a post from a year ago. In the post, I was…
Birthday day! Birthday day!
Not us. But I liked it. Photocredit. The Dainty Squid. Today is the birthday of my dear friend, Malissa. I wish you all had a Malissa in your life. (Well, to me she’s Miss. She’ll always be Miss. I’m sorry Malissa.) I…
The Best of 2014: Makeup
My name is Kylee and I’m absolutely not a professional makeup artist. (ha.) Instead, I thought I’d just share what works for me… right now. Meet: my makeup. These are the products that I currently love. Sure, the product lineup is…
Our 2014 Christmas Card
It’s annual Christmas Card time! (I love driving to my mailbox (yay Cabo) at this time of year!) For our 2014 card I was so excited to use the photos that my dear, dear friend Summer of Summer K Photography took…
What they Say. Volume IV.
1. (This one was pre-Hurricane, last July at her old school.) Valentina had a birthday party at school and her parents brought Cajita Felizes (Happy Meals) for all of the kids. Vivi apparently got a cheeseburger. Me: What did you…
Christmas Time in Mexico – when it’s only about 80 degrees.
So the girls’ Christmas program was yesterday. Amazing. So easy! They’re both in the same “pre-school” part of the school; Vivi is in Kinder I and Lila is in Kinder III/Preprimaria/Kindergarten so the program started at the same time for…
Jimmy Fallon. Our Village. Sparklepaint.
I’m home. It was beyond nice to see my sister. More on that trip later. 1. Is it weird that I am so happy for Jimmy Fallon? I’m so happy that he and his wife added a second baby girl to their…
on grief. Another feather.
So I’m typing this for the Los Cabos International Airport, SJD. It’s Thursday around 11 a.m. I’m going to visit my sister today. (!!!) (I tried this trip last year at the EXACT same time — remember what happened?) We’re…
I DON’T WANT TO SEE PICTURES OF WHAT YOUR ELF ON THE SHELF IS DOING.
Whew. Gasp. There. I said it. I don’t care about what your elf did last night. I don’t care about how he walked through flour making cookies. (Because he didn’t.) I don’t care about how he made a mess of…
On grief. The second Thanksgiving: done.
So, last year at this time I was thankful that Thanksgiving was over with. One holiday down. And I was bracing myself for Christmas. My Mom had been dead for about 2 months and 20 or so days and I…
![When I was a kid, my Mom would sometimes go to the grocery store at night while my baby sister and I were "supposed" to be sleeping. Baby sister slept, I stood by the window and watched for her headlights to turn back into the driveway, my stomach a gnarled mess while I waited.
The entire time she was gone I would create ill-fated stories in my mind that would ultimately leave her injured, kidnapped, or left for dead... I think these stories got worse after my Dad died. "What if I lose my one parent?"
I would stand there and worry.
And she always came back.
In one piece.
Over time, after therapy when I was younger, I realized that worrying doesn't shape anything... worrying doesn't CHANGE the outcome... but, it's real.
Telling someone not to worry is about as effective as telling someone not to cry when they're in the midst of full-sobbing or it's like asking someone WHERE they lost the thing that they lost.
"I can't find my keys."
"Where did you lose them."
[silence]
"Um, if I knew where I lost them, then..."
::
This time that we're living through right now is BIG and heavy and for the love of ALL THINGS HOLY it keeps on going.
I remember watching The Sound of Music when I was a kid and wondering when in the WORLD it would end. We're STUCK in the Sound of Music.
Schools opened, then closed.
Masks on, then off.
Life started, and stopped.
We've missed get-togethers and holidays.
Weddings and births.
We are as disconnected as ever.
Our worrying and concern and fear and anxiety is there... and it's real.
I see you.
I know this time is hard.
I'm not going to tell you to stop feeling the feelings, I just want you to know that I'm feeling them, too. (And therapy is helping.)
Get yourself a therapist.
Talk about all of this.
As I told one of my girls this week, “It’s ok not to be strong all the time.”
With love,
Ky](https://i2.wp.com/kyleebroughton.com/wp-content/plugins/instagram-feed/img/placeholder.png?w=1100&ssl=1)